On Mark Hamill

That is what I call my contractually obligated beard. Listen: I think they look fine on other people. It’s just not me. I mean, I never got used to it. But face foliage is almost a part of the costume. And it does bring a gravitas, perhaps unearned, but nevertheless, it makes a statement that they wanted to make, and I’m more than happy to oblige them.

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Mattias Marasigan
On Friendship

Imagine yourself at the edge of a cliff. Your best friend...a good friend...a friend...is beside you. Water is below. He says he's going to jump.

There's nothing dangerous about it. You can see that. Plenty of room for clearance. Rocks are non-existent. The water is deep enough. At this distance there's no true danger upon impact. Except he hesitates. It's not the jump that he's worried about. It's the swim. Treading water. Climbing back up. He hasn't used these muscles in a while, he says, and he's not sure his leg will work after the last injury. But you know these are just excuses. You know, as well as he, that he's going to eventually jump. It's just a matter of when.

So what do you do?

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The Plague of Failure

Probably the hardest lesson during Recovery was forgiving my own transgressions towards myself.

I didn't realize at first, but while sitting in that tiny room with six grown men, contemplating the difficulty between accepting other's forgiveness or God's or our own, and discussing the merits of grace itself, I discovered the root of my disease. Not the starting point, mind you, but the area which has kept me stuck for more than ten years. When the conversation turned my way I was struck with silence. Typically I'm not known as a quiet one, but I was afraid of saying anything. Nerves were not the issue. It was the simplicity.

 "It can't be this." I thought. "Because the sense it makes is way too much."

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Oh, So That's Who You Are

I often wonder about how I might raise my future children. I don't know if that's abnormal, but to me it always felt crucial. Better to think about it now than to learn on the spot...probably.

A major component of raising children comes with the initial perspective upon conception. How do you view your children? If they are someone to be molded or shaped, then most likely you'll spend much of your time correcting behavior, pointing out what they are doing wrong, or making decisions based on what you believe is best for them. This is somewhat of the "You are my child and you do what I say" mentality; though it doesn't have to be as strong. If they were a mistake - or unexpected - then most of your time might be a frustrating example of how to get your two lives (before the child/after the child) to align, or playing catchup. That's not to take away from the mistakes that have become major blessings to countless parents out there. However, for me, the view of the child has to be that of a gift. From the conception onward, this is a human being, created by God for a purpose. Sure, it's my job to guide them, and maybe even teach them the ways of the world.

More importantly - it's my privilege to witness them discover who they are.

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The Invitation

There's an image of Aladdin standing on a floating carpet. He asks, "Do you trust me?" with an outstretched hand. Then before you know it we're sweapt up onto the carpet with him, and we're on this magical ride through the desert during a musical scene that has captured the hearts of millions of little girls everywhere. It is that moment, however, with the outstretched hand, that we seem to glaze over completely. We want the magic. We want to fly. We want the fireworks. We want to fall in love. But that all starts with the question. The invitation.

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Why I don't want your number

Having begun dating again I've decided to approach it differently. Shocker. (you're not allowed to give me the definition of insanity anymore.) Call it a social experiment, call it being desperate, or just call it stupid. I prefer the term maverick, for the record, or genius, for my close friends. Whatever it is...it's different. In today's age of digital connection and with no lack of options for pursuing relationships, I've decided to go Old School.

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