Posts in dating
Crushes In My Early Twenties VS My Late Twenties

A crush is like a wave.

Imagine you’re standing in the ocean, your back towards the sea, about waist deep in the surf. You don’t know when it might come, but the current picks up right before it happens. Pulling back just before the wave impacts, engulfs, and passes over you as it continues onwards, tapering off just before, the beach.

Emotions happen. Much like the waves of the ocean, there is very little we can do to control them. In fact, I’d say we’re quite powerless when it comes to crushes — or infatuation. If this is something you’d rather not deal with then I suppose you have two options: Learn to surf, or get out of the water.

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On Our Capacity to Love

What plucks on the heartstrings? What causes the sparks and the butterflies? What causes us to say, "I don't know, but I like being around you" about someone over someone else?

Because this capacity to love - or like - doesn't seem to translate from one person to another. Not like our ability to use our thumbs, or the reason we prefer to walk upright. We learned to jump because we have to. We learned to like the way someone tilts their head because...we WANTED to? 

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On Friendship

Imagine yourself at the edge of a cliff. Your best friend...a good friend...a friend...is beside you. Water is below. He says he's going to jump.

There's nothing dangerous about it. You can see that. Plenty of room for clearance. Rocks are non-existent. The water is deep enough. At this distance there's no true danger upon impact. Except he hesitates. It's not the jump that he's worried about. It's the swim. Treading water. Climbing back up. He hasn't used these muscles in a while, he says, and he's not sure his leg will work after the last injury. But you know these are just excuses. You know, as well as he, that he's going to eventually jump. It's just a matter of when.

So what do you do?

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Why I don't want your number

Having begun dating again I've decided to approach it differently. Shocker. (you're not allowed to give me the definition of insanity anymore.) Call it a social experiment, call it being desperate, or just call it stupid. I prefer the term maverick, for the record, or genius, for my close friends. Whatever it is...it's different. In today's age of digital connection and with no lack of options for pursuing relationships, I've decided to go Old School.

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