Posts in Unfinished/Rough Idea
A Manifesto from the Friend Zone

I'm the guy who is "so good to see!" but not the guy who gets invited. It makes me wonder if I can only be accepted in moderation. One may think that I'm a busy person, or constantly on-the-go, during these situations, but the truth is - I have a lot of downtime. So when a person tells me, at a party or a get together, that it's so good to see me, I wonder, "Why - exactly - don't I see you more often?"

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On Disappointment

I'm a big fan of showing one's disappointment; though I have to be careful not to let that turn into disapproval. Letting others know you're disappointed can produce various results. Stronger bonds in friendship. Deeper understanding of one's own insecurities. A new drive towards better performance. Disappointment derives from our own understanding that things should - could have been - better. In essence, it didn't have to be "this way", or things could have been different.

The problem becomes: what if we're disappointed in ourselves?

How do we deal with THAT?

Disappointment is, ultimately, a misstep on the uncharted journey. When it comes to disappointment in oneself, ultimately it's a reflection on past decisions - or lapses in judgement. It's when we find ourselves at the bottom of a rocky valley, in the middle of a depressing looking creek, or just outside a desolate field and wonder "How exactly did I get here? This is not where I intended to go."

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Oh, So That's Who You Are

I often wonder about how I might raise my future children. I don't know if that's abnormal, but to me it always felt crucial. Better to think about it now than to learn on the spot...probably.

A major component of raising children comes with the initial perspective upon conception. How do you view your children? If they are someone to be molded or shaped, then most likely you'll spend much of your time correcting behavior, pointing out what they are doing wrong, or making decisions based on what you believe is best for them. This is somewhat of the "You are my child and you do what I say" mentality; though it doesn't have to be as strong. If they were a mistake - or unexpected - then most of your time might be a frustrating example of how to get your two lives (before the child/after the child) to align, or playing catchup. That's not to take away from the mistakes that have become major blessings to countless parents out there. However, for me, the view of the child has to be that of a gift. From the conception onward, this is a human being, created by God for a purpose. Sure, it's my job to guide them, and maybe even teach them the ways of the world.

More importantly - it's my privilege to witness them discover who they are.

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